“Mom, can I marry Ben?”
Ben is Luke’s friend from school.
(sound of can of worms opening)
“Do you want to marry Ben?”
“Yeah,” he said plainly, as if I’d asked him if he wanted a sandwich.
(attempt to side-step intricate conversation)
“Ok, marry Ben,” I said.
“Can two men have babies?” he asked.
“Can two women have babies?”
“Nope. Nature set it up so that a man and a woman can make a baby.”
(Body parts tomfoolery hasn’t been explained in our house yet.)
(insert explanation about sex and conception? Hell no.)
“That’s just the way it is, Buddy.”
Luke switched gears to apartment hunting after that, asking if he and his friend could get a place together so that they could hang out all the time, to which I said Sure, Buddy. Just go to college and then get a job so you can pay for it. He seemed satisfied with that.
You can say it. I totally bombed that conversation. I was driving and it was the end of a long day and – any other excuses I can interest you in?
I’m happy that my son’s mind is meandering toward these topics, yet for me to explain everything to him, with the most detail while also attempting to simplify it, I can’t be driving and fielding questions from the 3-year-old at the same time.
Madeleine would’ve just started laughing and singing a song about penises and vaginas and poop (since poop always makes an appearance in her songs) and the whole story would’ve headed off-track. And Luke would definitely have started shouting, Shut up, Madeleine!!!
I do plan on bringing it up again when we have a quiet moment together. Adoption is another topic I want to touch upon, although I know it’ll be another layer he’ll have to process. I think it’s important to lay it all out for him either way.