You can have it all, just not all at once

One of things I like most about making new friends is getting to share a fresh perspective on anything from which laundry detergent to use to having a better attitude about life.

Yesterday, as our kids played and ate lunch and watched My Little Pony, my friend Laura and I talked about things that have been on our minds – the possibility of selling a home, living in a new place, and career goals for the future.  I admitted that I’ve been frustrated lately because I feel like certain aspects of life are on hold at the moment, and I’m not sure how to make the next decision to enrich my life as well as my family’s life.

What she said next is probably the best advice I’ve heard lately…

Imagine your life as a line of buckets as far as the eye can see.  From beginning to end, each bucket will have something different inside it – you are born, your first day of school, you get into college and leave home, your first job, you get married, have children, buy a home.  The buckets continue and each one holds something else that brings you joy in your life.

One bucket can’t possibly carry all of those things at once.

Thanks, Laura!  Brilliant pearls of wisdom!

What wonderful advice have you been given lately?  Is there something you often say to friends who need a little guidance?  I’d love to hear.

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This entry was published on February 26, 2014 at 3:25 pm and is filed under chitchat, relationships, women. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

4 thoughts on “You can have it all, just not all at once

  1. Our eldest is prone to fits of anxiety when he is obliged to do something – homework for example – and especially if he has to do it in a hurry (or thinks he does). I tell him, when he starts to hyperventilate (yes, he really does), to just stop for a moment, to think about the relative importance of the task at hand, and realize that it may not be nearly as important as he thinks it is.
    And that’s the crux of my advice to anybody. Stop for a moment. Think about the issue at hand. Then relax. It’s probably just not that important. You’re racing to get your kids to school, sweating and swearing and driving much too fast. You know what? If they’re a few minutes late for school, does it really matter all that much? Is it worth the stress, the high blood pressure, the increased probability that you’ll run over a cat or a kid? Of course not. Two words: re lax.

    • I marvel at people I know who are naturally laid back. What a gift to have in life. On the other hand, I think I’d rather be excitable for when those inevitable moments arise when you need to act deftly. Can’t have everything I guess. And thanks for the link to the book on kids questions. Looks interesting.

      • Ah, if you think I’m laid back I’ve been unclear. I am wound tight as a tourniquet most of the time. Seriously, my advice regarding relaxing is aimed mostly at myself, but I’ve learned (to a certain extent) not to be so excitable that I make myself vomit, and to take a wider perspective. It works. Sometimes.

      • Don’t worry. You don’t come across as laid back! Someone so pensive couldn’t possibly be.

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